Not sure....what to write...haven't beenhere in a while. If only....

I had a cordless laptop.

I had a million dollars.

I had a grasp on reality.

2-4-03 - First day of college class and house was robbed. Burgler took my child's PlayStation2. I saved for many months and placed this item on lay-away so I could afford it. I guess I shoulda just stolen one. All my child's games that go with the PS2. My child's Gameboy Advance. All our DVD's (except Madonna and The Shawshank Redemption). All my jewlery, given to me by my husband and my father; even one item from my retired boss and the bracelet my child gave me. Even the three dollars in dimes from my change can (that's how I know it was a person who knows me. The apartment wasn't ransacked...only these items were taken - and the change, by someone who knew what was in the can).

It's just stuff...and yes, that's correct. No one hurt my child, who took the bus home that day. Violated, but unharmed. It took my child seven days to feel safe sleeping in his own room.

2-5-03 - Called police to take report and fingerprints. Growing marijuana on the patio is a bad thing. One plant - felony charge for cultivation. Off to jail I went to experienced the kindness of officers who think I'm an idiot. I suppose I am. I could have yanked the plant and thrown it over the fence...but noooooo, I led the officers right to it. I had nine long hours to think about my life and the direction I was taking. By the time I was released (on my own recognizance or "O.R.'ed" for you other 'criminals') I had given up the bad bud...not act of temporary insanity (although I did 'slip' once on Wednesday, but the feeling was not a good one and I decided to close that chapter once and for all).

2-6-03 - Having removed teenage (one month shy of eighteen) from my home following robbery, I was confronted by said teen at 11:00 p.m. Thursday evening after my second night of class. Teen did not understand why she had to go (move out), when she clearly did not steal our things. I stated (once again) that I would not allow anyone who was not enrolled in school or working and contributing to just 'hang out' in my home and eat my food and use my phone and facilities. If she had locked the back door or removed her pot pipe from the coffee table prior to leaving the aprtment that previous Tuesday, maybe we wouldn't have been robbed. She actually threw back at me that she was ONLY seventeen. This excuse may have cut mud, if not for the facts - no school and no job after many, many months. I said 'good night, I love you, lock the door when you leave' and I went to bed.

Today is Valentine's Day. Spread the Love.